Frustrated By High Inflammation (The Dying Logs Day 57)

My inflammation is still incredibly high but that’s to be expected. I at least hope by the end of next week I have improvement.

But my earlobes are both so inflamed that the pain runs down my jaw. I’m not even sure if they’re infected. I’ve never seen it quite like this before.

Diarrhea still but that seems to be improving a little bit every day – already far better than what the phage triggered.

Frustrating and a bit nerve wracking as I’m in the danger zone for things like fistulas and fissured which are complex, terrible, and long lasting.

Hardly getting any sleep as expected considering both withdrawals and I expect it to only worsen next week as I make another benzo cut.

Doing a tiny bit better energy wise so I’m hoping in a couple of days I’ll be able to hit the ground running and do basic things like write, walk, read, and generally push myself to get some semblance of motivation.

Tedious, frustrating, hard to believe even – welcome to the life of the chronically ill.

The second I get any vitality I go with it and every day I fight an invisible enemy – even if the the fight is just making it through a day in bed absolutely exhausted and in significant pain.

My loved ones (mostly) understand and believe in me and I have God. I will get out of the dying logs. Stare into the abysses and there will be light.